There is a lot of buzz about self care these days. And although the pandemic has made us slow down, I don’t think it has shone a bright enough light on self care.

When you go about your life at 120 miles per hour, as we are all taught that successful people are busy, you lose your sense of what life really is meant to be. It wasn’t until I was forced to go 25 miles per hour that I realized when you speed through life you miss a lot of things. My body took over at a point where it needed to, I couldn’t go on. I was exhausted, stressed and came crashing down with a cancer diagnosis. It took me months to learn self care, and years to build a life that took care of me.

Self care is not escaping from your life, it’s building a life that cares for you.

Most people view self care as taking time for a bubble bath or a massage, escaping from your everyday. It’s more than reading self care quotes. To experience the full effects, you have to be willing to take adult-ing to it’s peak. You need to ask yourself the tough questions about what you really want in life and answer true to yourself.

What makes you say, “More days like today!” When you lay your head on your pillow smiling and fulfilled, what was your day like? Not your IG day, an authentic, “I don’t care what you think, it made me happy day.” Truly diving into self care takes time. It means budgeting and deciding what you really need to live your best life, making choices between keeping up with the neighbours or living within your means, and taking a path that may be the long way to your goals.  However, it also means enjoying your life while on your path.

Focus in on you.

When you no longer focus on outside approval and focus on inside improvement, that’s self care. I realize that you may have a family or built a busy life that you can not just up and do what ever you like.  Nor do I think that living with self care means giving everything up. This is where the designing comes in and that takes time.  Slowly implementing activities can result in a more enjoyable journey.

Plan to take care of yourself in these three ways:

• Physically – Feeding yourself real food, getting the proper amount of sleep, moving your body, regular medical check ups, and paying attention to what your body needs.
• Mentally – Budgeting and living with in your means to lessen the stress in your head. Reading, listening to music, doing your hobby, or journaling. Make a place where you feel comfortable, and your worries fade.
• Emotionally – Having a coffee with a friend (even if it’s virtual these days), meditating, becoming more mindful and the toughest of all, setting boundaries and allowing yourself to be vulnerable.

Facing the stark truth that you can’t do everything for everyone all the time. What serves you best? What makes you happy?

Do the work, make the plan, and build the life that takes care of you.

Unsure where to start?  Want to build that life, that’s where I come in. You can take advantage of my one free consultation where we can discuss building a life of self care happiness.

Have a friend who would benefit from this article? Please share.

And if you are not sure where to start or how to build that life, that’s where I come in. You can take advantage of my one free consultation where we can discuss building a life of self care happiness.

Have a friend who would benefit from this article? Please share.

Candy Ashbee is a two-time cancer survivor who has turned her adversity into an opportunity to help other through coaching.  EmergeandEvolve.ca